do one thing everyday that scares you...

supposedly eleanor roosevelt said that in her lifetime and someone thought that worthy enough of being remembered to quote her on it. baz lurhman also used that in his Wear Sunscreen song.

it's one of those quotations that feels good to say but you don't really like to do it. you can live by the words but not really act on it.

well, it happened on tuesday. another mouse-caught-in-trap-but-not-dead incident. this time, it was 8AM and mike would not be home for a good while that meant i'd have to deal with a live mouse stuck on a trap under my kitchen sink for the next 9+ hours. haunting me. teasing me. reminding me that i was actually FEARING a tiny mouse. a tiny handicapped mouse at this point.

i texted mike. "we have another one... i think it's dead... no, it's def alive!" he called. i checked under the sink again, slowly opening the cabinet only to find the mouse looking at me. i shrieked. and ran away. i actually ran into the other room. uuuuuugh. iiiiiiick. groooooooooooossss. and i had the heebee jeebees. he told me to just get rid of it. JUST get RID OF IT?!! MEEE??? I don't think so. I can't. Are you sure you don't want to come home at lunch and take care of it?  Well, then, just shut the cabinet door and leave it alone. for the next. eight. hours.

i talked to my friend. told her what the sitch was. she laughed with me. she cringed with me. she empathized. i know what that's like. growing up in a city, i had to actually get rid of the dead mice that were trapped. You can do it. It's kind of empowering. Just think about it.  

 So I thought about it. And i went back to the cabinet under the sink and opened the door. i looked at the mouse. long. and hard. for a good full solid two minutes. and then i shut the door. i can't do this. and i'm ok with that.

about a half hour later, i revisted him. this time, he had moved around. no eye contact. so i took the tongs, and disposed of him.

and i walked a little taller. 

today, Mo is visiting. taking care of any leftover unwelcomed house guests.

it's good to do the scary things. you realize, sometimes, that they're not so scary. and other times, you realize they are scary. but you can deal with the fear. because someone else did. and they survived.